18 August 2011

Not cool, Circus World!!! NOT COOL!!

This week, I am loathing Circus World!  I loathe red necks with the nerve to produce children.  And most of all, I LOATHE RED NECKS WITH BIRTHDAY PARTIES!!!  What was meant to be a nice Monday night little practice for my two skating amigos y me, turned out to be us stuck in a hellish cage of psycho spawn on wheels!!  Who the hell throws a big birthday party on a Monday night? 

So apparently my little problem of not being able to sleep, and then me skating and/or going out every night of the week without any down time makes me a little aggressive.  I may have cracked a little bit on Monday.  This horrible kid had decided to make it his mission to deliberately trip and run into us (though personally, I think he had a crush on Morgan) on that tiny blue floor.  This happened several times throughout the evening and I began seething a bit.  Well, he came at me full speed with the intent to crash into me, but instead, before he hit me, I grabbed the little shit by his shirt and screamed in his face.  And though this is a bit of a blur to me...I may or may not have shoved him to the ground after that...there's no telling, I was blind with insomnia induced rage. (yeah, that's as far as I'll admit in type.)  At any rate, this was followed by a screaming match with the little shit's mom...it started out as "don't you lay a finger on my kid!!".  Then after I spewed out some unrepeatable dialogue about her miscreant offspring, she ended with "well if he does it again, come tell me and I'll whoop his butt."  Yes, friends, red necks use phrases with "whoop" in them.  I personally feel like she was made to feel the full weight of her errant parenting and reproductive skills.

Saturday, was an epic bout at Municipal Auditorium:  Nashville against the no longer undefeated Carolina Rollergirls (oh yeah, that means NRG WON!!!).  Every time I go to an NRG bout and see the insane skill, athleticism, and general bad-assery; I am reminded of why I am killing myself every week to learn to skate.  I've never felt so absolutely sure of something in my life; as I do every single time I put skates on and every single skate is (sometimes more or less) better than the last.  I may not be stellar right now, but what I lack in skill I make up for in scrappiness and passion.  I would cut off my fingers if it would help me skate better (and call myself "Stumps!").  I fight my attitude and former shyness this whole time, but every week some new skill clicks and that keeps me going every time.  Somehow this week I pulled off some backward toe stops and a baseball slide.  Not sure where those came from, but I'll take 'em!

We (my fearless skating comrades and I) have developed a rigorous training schedule to get ourselves to derby level before we do the Derby 101 weekend of insanity.  This includes 4 skate days and 2 off skate workouts.  This week's skate number 3 will occur at the most incredible freshly paved green way!!  Morgan and I gave it a try last week and it was one of my absolute favorite skating experiences thus far.  You can go ridiculously fast and you don't have to turn.  I'm shooting for about 7.5-10 miles this week...we did just under 5 last week.

After a hot jaunt through the East Nash Tomato Fest. insanity (oddly, I didn't see very many tomatoes, just a lot of sweaty people), I went to the skate shop and got my new wheels!  I ended up with the Bzerk Madman 91a's that I mentioned in my last post.  I rather love them.  They are wide enough to deal with my bulk, and oh so much faster than the previous ones.  A very sound purchase...for now.  I'll need better ones later.  I'm now contemplating finding a cheap-o pair of skates to use for outdoor skating only...I get tired of changing my wheels all the time.  I'm kind of concerned that if I go the super cheap route that my feet may be damaged or something...anyone have any suggestions? 

OH Geeeeezz, a food coma is about to pummel me.  Tex's BBQ on Foster Avenue, folks...O.M.G. 


  1. Who are you??????? Ahh my little Katie actually new your name is Skatie. Skatie Couric you are awesome. Your house looks adorable and sweet unlike you ultra -ego ...Sienna can't wait to come sleepover.
    I love this new attitude, honesty, and badassery!!!

  2. sheesh woman. update your blog.